Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Yeah, We Were Wrong About the Red Ring!

The famous Maxim's in Paris, founded in 1893
Photo by Chompstick


I am greeted at the entrance to Maxim's by the elderly maître d'hôtel, and escorted to my table where I am seated on a plush, red velvet banquette. With a flourish, the stooped man deftly flicks the napkin onto my lap, but not before it hits me on the nose.

I visually wallow in the surroundings of the elegant Art Nouveau interior of this landmark Parisian restaurant. For the duration of my lunch, I will be an equal of these sophisticated, yet snooty, French men and women.  Maybe.

I greedily eyeball the Swarovski chandeliers and original oil paintings by artists whose names I cannot pronounce. Then I am shocked, but delighted, to spot Coco Chanel!  Wait, she's dead. It's just a photograph.

As I await the arrival of my tardy dinner mate, the waiter approaches the table and looks down at me with an ever so slight hint of disdain. With an impolite thunk, he places two glasses of house champagne on the table. I remind him that I'll need a third for my guest. I wonder if it's obvious to the other patrons that I am not imbibing Dom Perignon. I hope they don't notice the plastic goblets.

As I contemplate the starched linen tablecloth, a raspy voice descends. I glance over at the red stilettos and scarlet silk sheath on my Spicy friend. She's hot. Upon her head is perched a couture, gilded Statute of Liberty hat. My heart skips a beat and my breath catches at the gorgeous sight. No, not her, you fools! The decadent patisserie cart being pushed behind her.

She takes her seat and I look down at my own OshKosk B'Gosh overalls and wonder if I should have given more care to removing the errant hay from my pockets. Perhaps that is why we are seated at a remote table near the kitchen.

The waiter, who is no longer bothering to conceal his contempt, asks to take our order.
"Les dames sont prêtes pour passer vos commandes?"

"Garçon," I answer, "s'il vous plaît apporter deux ordres de etats unis académie navale anneaux dans une sauce au beurre blanc avec Tabasco."

"Oui, madame, deux bagues Naval Academy immédiatement," he confirms.

Excellent! Our entrées in spicy butter sauce will be prepared right away. Toot de suite.

The increasingly surly server soon returns with a tray. I steal a quick glance at my reflection in the sterling silver cloche, and remove a piece of straw from my teeth before he lifts the dome to reveal two perfect specimens of the rings we had misidentified as United States Naval Academy mementos. We now know we were wrong and misled others.

"Are you ready to eat crow?" Tabasko asks me. "Pass the salt," I reply sourly, then bite into the red center stone of the ring.  "You know," I add, "it's a little known fact that in the original script for the pilot, Red attended West Point instead of the Naval Academy." Tabby chokes uncouthly on a piece of the etched jewelry and shouts an expletive in her loud Brooklyn accent.

Darn. Now we might be IDd as Americans. We fit in so well until now.


Closet Man's Ring
Ring from Sir Crispix Cranberry

(Moniker courtesy of Tabasko)

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bravo! Bravo! Encore!

Delightfully written in all the color and flavor of our secret little cabal, aka TBSG!

Chomps and Tabby, you are the most charming coquettes, how could we possibly presume resentment with that kind of flirtatious flair?

Tatiana said...

Chomps - one question though: what scene did the second ring show up in? I don't even remember seeing it but I only watched that episode once so far.

Honey West said...

LOL! Pretty funny story! I still say it's a genetically altered Naval Academy ring. So, enquiring minds want to know, did the stone taste like cinnamon or cherry?

Tabasko said...

Is that fangirl in #1 or just the ring talking? I think it's fan.

Tatiana #2: It's in the episode comments, all 150 plus, LOL. I don't blame anyone for not seeing it! We are lucky to have so many comments.

Anyhow, someone (Kodiak) brought to our attention in Spoilers a ring could be seen on Sir Crispin's hand. So a few BSGers knew to watch. Honestly, I would have missed it otherwise.

Anyway, directly after the scene where Samar and Ressler are on a plane heading to where they think Crispin is and find they need to go to Pittsburgh, the very next scene is a direct close up on Crispin's hand that lasts several moments while he is speaking to his assistant.

That's all that's in the shot, his hand and the ring.

You can see the ring other places, but it was the only thing in the frame in that shot.

And many of us (ahem) thought that ring and the ring on the man who put Liz in the closet back in Luther Braxton were going to be Naval Academy rings and related to Red in that way.

But the screencaps tell a different story!

Tabasko said...

Honey West, we know that's the story. Ring #1 was not available. It had extensive facial surgery and voila! Ring #2.

What if the set people just lost the first ring and thought no one would notice?

Chompstick said...

Maybe it's another Hudson-gate! Pull a switcheroo and hope no one notices.

BL Mom said...

Chompstick, this is really good! I was happy to wake up to a piece from you. Well done, and smart and funny.

I don't know French, so I'm looking up Google Translator, ☺

LOL, you are all funny. It could be a Karakurt ring, or a Hudson! Hudson should get a spin off or at least a DVD extra saying where he is!

Marie said...

You are so funny!

Chompstick said...

Thanks everyone! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I don't know French either. I used Google translator to write it so hopefully it will make sense translated back. But basically I wrote, "The waiter asked if he could take our order," then I wrote that in French. Then I ordered in French, I said he confirmed it in French, then I wrote "Our entrees in butter sauce ..." to clue you in. You'll have to let me know if the reverse translations are absurd!

One Paul said...

Chompstick, very funny! Hey, I wrote in capital letters on the episode page that tbe rings were the same. While we're 'fessing up.

At least we know what it is for future reference! It would not totally surprise me if it is meant to be the same one, one to the other, now that you mention it, Tabs and Chompstick!

Crispix Cranberry! He sounded like breakfast cereal to me, too. Haha. Crispy Crandalls, part of a wholesome breakfast. ;)

Very enjoyable. You do write well, Chompstick!

Kodiak said...

You guys are so funny! Great job!

Me, too. I told everyone on the spoiler page it was the same ring and we decided months ago Closet Man had a Naval Ring. xD

I agree, Paul, it will at least be known now.

Great work, Chompstick!

You 2 ladies are great!

fangirl said...

Chomps, your writing talent shines through!!! You and Tabs should seriously consider a career as a writing team.

What a scene!! You set it beautifully, evocatively, and other adjectives. I hope you and Tabs are wrong again about more details of the show as time goes on, so we can hope to enjoy more such literary gems!!

I really can't express how fun this was to read. Really great, and proves once again that we're witnessing the fledgling steps of a seriously talented comedy writing team -- Chomps and Tab.

Bravissima!!!!

fangirl said...

PS the comment immediately above is the only comment I've posted here!!! I always try to remember to log in before reading or posting, so you always know it's me. Or moi, as the case may be :)

Iowa Watcher said...

I think that either both rings are supposed to be the ssme, or the show runners are yanking our chains with that lingering shot on Sir C's hand, and I wouldn't put chain-yanking past them, since they seem to like inside jokes.

Speaking of Hudson, whatever did happen to Liz's dog? There's another infamous dangling thread. I guess that we are supposed to forget about that, too.

The writers need to know that details matter. Some fans watch the same episode several times. I generally watch them at least twice myself, just because I'm usually worn out when the first one airs and I miss things.

Thanks the photos and all the great commentary!

Chompstick said...

I think they're the same ring.

Tabasko said...

Chomps #15: Yes, I believe they are the same. Just neither is Navy.

The closet screen cap, that hand is somewhat in motion and could account for the slight seeming difference in size, or different angles and lighting, focus. They look similar enough to me to me suspicious.

Or they could write if off to Liz's iffy memory and have it be the same one.

I think they are the same, otherwise why hold the shot on it? - As Iowa Watcher chose, "lingering" (good word IW)

Iowa, yes I think many people watch TBL episodes at least a couple of times, and it still takes a village to get it all, LOL.

Where the heck is Hudson? I mean really.

Thanks for the nice comments, fangirl. For some reason, I thought your forget to sign in! Perish the thought! Je suis désolée!

Usually, we delete those Anons! But someone should claim it! It's too good a comment to lose! Maybe it was our dear Charmed, who I know is having computer issues.





Chompstick said...

Yes, I think it might be Charmed, too. She often uses such delightful turn of phrase. Anyway, I'm not deleting such a complimentary comment! Wait ... did you write it, Tabby???? lol

Ines said...

Chomps# This is gold!!

Like most of you, I think it was probably a case of plastic surgery ;)

Sometimes the correct solution is the simplest. The writers probably never though that somewhere out there people will be going to take printscreens, zoom in and discuss differences of patterns only notice then!

Honey West said...

No, they are definitely two different rings. The emblems on the left sides are different. And on Closet Man's ring I just can't make it say ARMY beyond a shadow of a doubt. It's like it was purposely disfigured. Where the light hits it should have a definite letter "M" and it looks more like a "Z" or a "2". LOL!

Tabasko said...

Chomps-Elysées #17: LOL! I haven't started referring to myself in the 3rd person.....yet! But a fine compliment to your superior writing, I will chime with Charmed. It's a bravo! (brava) Coquette is a Charmed word.

Ines #18: : )) Yes, lol, the TPTB don't know us that well, do they? But they do make it make sense, eventually.

Honey West #19: Haha! I gotta say I just can't tell for sure. I rarely don't agree with you, though! I do see an "A" at the beginning of the Closet Man's ring. It looks like "Army" kind of off to the side just like Crispy's, not entirely centered under the "United States." I sort of see the "M" and the "Y", too.

Maybe that guy had a bad engraver and he carved out "Amzy."

It's getting to be like one of those 3D puzzles where you just can't see what's supposed to be there. If I had to bet, they will be connected, if not the same. Fortunately, there is no wagering! I think it's more than an Easter egg, like the red egg way back, or Red's Flat Cat's collar. It was just so there.

BL Mom said...

Chompstick #9, they came out quite close!

Tatiana said...

Mes amis, c'est j'étais le seul qui l'a écrit!

"Bravo! Bravo! Encore!

Delightfully written in all the color and flavor of our secret little cabal, aka TBSG!

Chomps and Tabby, you are the most charming coquettes, how could we possibly presume resentment with that kind of flirtatious flair?"

Tabasko said...

Tatiana #22: : ))))))

I knew it was one of our smart and funny chicks of the BSG. Thanks!

Honey West said...

Tabasko #20 - AMZY - LOL!

Tabasko said...

Honey West, always glad to give you a laugh!!

James Cherry said...

Season 4 is now official per multiple sources - horray!